Get ready to laugh, cringe, or roll your eyes. Unfortunately, Like many generalizations, these stereotypes are rooted in truths.
Top 10 Derogatory Adjectives Used to Describe Successful Women
1. BOSSY
Is leadership a positive quality in men, only?
In the grand theater of professional life, a man who takes charge is lauded as a natural leader. He’s the captain, the boss, the go-to guy when things need to get done.
Generally, what happens in the workplace when a woman exhibits the same leadership qualities? She’s called overbearing, officious, autocratic, or domineering.
Close your eyes and imagine the absurdity of a man being described as bossy. He’d likely laugh it off, or maybe even be flattered and wear it as a badge of honor. Meanwhile, his female counterpart at work is left to navigate the delicate balance of appearing authoritative without crossing an imaginary line into arrogance. The next time someone describes a woman as bossy, perhaps remind them that it’s simply means “excellent leader.”
The modern workplace is a landscape where gender-based double standards continue to persist, despite significant strides toward equality. Women and men often find themselves judged by different criteria for the same behaviors, leading to a disparity in how their actions are perceived and rewarded.
An influential blog that addresses this inequality is “Lean In,” founded by Sheryl Sandberg, the former COO of Facebook. Her blog and its accompanying social media channels provide a wealth of resources and discussions about the barriers women often face in their careers. Her book, “Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead” delves into these double standards, offering anecdotal and statistical evidence of how women’s leadership qualities are often misinterpreted. The blog encourages women to support each other and challenge biases by promoting a culture of mutual respect and understanding.
2. AGGRESSIVE
She’s aggressive, he’s “motivated.”
Here’s another gem from the dictionary of double standards: “aggressive.” When a man is forceful, driven, and relentless in pursuing goals, he’s considered driven, focused, and ambitious. These qualities are typically seen as positive traits that signal confidence and leadership potential. However, when women display the same qualities, they are often labeled overly assertive or bossy. This double standard undermines women’s contributions and discourages them from exhibiting behaviors crucial for career advancement. It’s as if ambition has a gender bias; women are expected to be successful while remaining sweet, while men are encouraged to boldly go after whatever they want.
The reality? Assertiveness is a necessary trait for success, regardless of gender. While men are encouraged to exhibit this trait, women are often chastised. If you hear a woman called assertive or aggressive, know she is probably doing exactly what her male counterparts are praised for.
3. EMOTIONAL
Her passion can be labeled as pathos.
Men can show passion, get fired up about their projects, and even pound their fists on the table in moments of enthusiasm. They’re considered committed. When a woman shows the same zealousness, she’s branded as emotional. Her ardor is viewed negatively, suggesting that her feelings are a liability rather than an asset.
This stereotype implies that women can’t handle the pressures of leadership because their emotions get in the way. EQ is a critical skill for effective leadership, and women who show passion are often more connected, empathetic, and motivated. Maybe consider celebrating this so-called “temperamental” nature for what it is: a powerful driver of success.
One notable voice addressing these issues is the Instagram account @Feminist, which posts about challenges women face in professional settings. With over a million followers, it has become a platform for sharing stories and raising awareness about gender inequality. @Feminist features stories of women being penalized for traits celebrated in men, such as ambition and decisiveness. The posts resonate with many of its followers, who share their experiences of workplace bias in the comments.
4. INTIMIDATING
Is her competence frightening?
In the workplace, competent men are seen as go-getters, their prowess and skills elevating them to hero status. But for women, being highly capable comes with a surprising side effect: being labeled as intimidating. It’s as if this trait in a woman is frightening rather than inspiring.
Women who excel are not intimidating; they are merely excellent at what they do. Their proficiency should inspire others to step up, not shrink back. If you find a successful woman intimidating, it might be time to reevaluate your insecurities.
IG accounts like @Girlboss and @Ladies Get Paid are pivotal in this dialogue. They share empowering stories of women breaking double standards and achieving success on their terms. They also advise on navigating and challenging biases, from negotiating salaries to managing team dynamics. These platforms emphasize that while progress has been made, there is a work to be done to create a truly equal workplace.
5. AMBITIOUS
Is wanting to achieve something a character flaw?
Ambition is celebrated as a key to success, especially for men. When men are ambitious, they’re seen as visionaries, trailblazers, and future leaders. For women, however, ambition is viewed suspiciously. It’s as if wanting to achieve something significant is a character flaw.
Focused women are often accused of being too driven, or excessively power-hungry. The reality? Ambition should be encouraged in everyone. Women have every right to aspire to greatness without facing backlash for it. Ambition is not a dirty word; it’s a compliment. Let’s support and celebrate women who dare to dream big and go after their goals with gusto.
6. COLD
When her focus is interpreted as unfriendly.
A man who is intensely focused is seen as dedicated and serious. He’s in the zone, and nothing can distract him from achieving his goals. When a woman shows the same concentration, she’s often called cold or detached. Her dedication is misinterpreted as a lack of warmth.
This double standard suggests women must always be nurturing, even in professional settings. But focus and warmth are not mutually exclusive. It’s possible to be both dedicated to work and personable. The next time you encounter a woman “in the zone,” recognize her for what she is: a dedicated professional, not a cold-hearted ice queen.
7. CALCULATING
When her strategic thinking is described as manipulation.
Strategic thinking is a highly valued skill, especially in leadership roles. In a man, this trait is seen as shrewd, insightful, and forward-thinking. But when women exhibit it, they’re often labeled as calculating. It’s as if the ability to think several steps ahead is suspicious rather than admirable.
This stereotype unfairly paints women as deceitful when they’re simply being smart. This type of thinking is essential for success, and women who excel at it should be celebrated, not vilified. Let’s call it what it is: brilliance.
8. OPINIONATED
Is her point of view arrogant/
Having a strong point of view is a sign of confidence and intelligence. In a man, he is thought of as a leader or influencer. When women express their opinions assertively, they’re labeled overbearing. Their insights and viewpoints are unfairly dismissed.
This double standard silences women and discourages them from sharing valuable perspectives. Both sexes have every right to voice their points of view and both should be encouraged to do so. An opinionated woman is not full of herself; she’s confident and knowledgeable. Let’s listen to her, not shut her down.
9. STUBBORN
She sticks to her guns, while he’s “decisive.”
When men hold firm to their beliefs, they’re admired for their ability to stand their ground. When women do the same, they’re labeled stubborn or inflexible. This quality is only commendable if you’re male.
This stereotype diminishes resolve which is a valuable characteristic, regardless of gender. Women who stand firm in their beliefs and decisions should be respected for their conviction, not criticized for being stubborn. It takes strength to hold your ground in a world that pushes back.
10. OVERBEARING
Is knowing what she wants self-important?
In the professional world, knowing what you want and going after it is critical. Men who are clear about their goals and focused on achieving them are called driven and determined. When women exhibit the same clarity, they’re labeled overbearing.
This implies that women should be accommodating and respectful, even at the expense of their ambitions. Knowing what you want and pursuing it is not going overboard; it’s a mark of determination. Women should be celebrated for their clarity and drive, not criticized for these qualities.
The modern workplace is still rife with gender-based double standards that unfairly disadvantage women. Social media accounts and blogs are critical in highlighting these issues and providing a community of support and resources. By continuing to raise awareness and promote change, these platforms are helping pave the way for a more equitable future where leadership, ambition, and assertiveness are recognized and rewarded equally, regardless of your gender.
I’d love to hear what you think. Please email your comments and opinions to karen@bykbizer.